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ciel

Writer's Block: High school musical

If you had to choose a theme song for your middle or high school years, what would it be, and why?


The middle of my high school years were filled with overly exaggerated angst. I was very depressed. Bulimia took over for a while. I was so ashamed of myself and repulsed that I didn't want people to see me. I wanted to disappear. It was just another way to punish myself. I had just moved and had a hard time adjusting. It was a small community where everyone knew each other. When I started school, it was in the middle of the year and I felt out of place. Due to my social anxiety, I didn't make many friends or go out other than for class. I felt a heavy awkward atmosphere surrounded me around groups of people. I didn't know responsibility then yet I felt like the world's weight was on my shoulders. I suppose that's the luxury of youth, to have so much spare time to fret. Heh.

Animal I have become - three days grace

"I can't escape this hell
So many times I've tried
But I'm still caged inside
Somebody get me through this nightmare
I can't control myself"


they can't save us now - kill hannah
"they can't save us now
'cause we're far away from home
and there's no where else to go ..
so this is how it feels to be insane
the world looks like a movie always playin
but how can hearts so young feel so much pain"


runaway - cartel
"tell me how can you deal with all this weight?
Speak now, you must have a secret..
Until then you can runaway,
Do your best to hide your face.
"

Autumn's monologue - from autumn to ashes

"Oh why can't I be what you need?
A new improved version of me
But I'm nothing so good
No, I'm nothing
Just bones, a lonely ghost burning down songs..
Here I'm pinned between darkness and light
Bleached and blinded by these nights
Where I'm tossing and tortured 'til dawn"

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ciel

August 2010

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